Small happiness at park
Due to the COVID, my pet sitter and dogwalker's work has decreased to near zero. Thankfully there are still few regulars morning walks and midday walks every day. There is about 30 minutes of free time between the two time frames, so I started to take a break at Golden Gate Park everyday. The winter in San Francisco is the rainy season, but this year it doesn't rain at all, and it's fine every day. So my break time at the park is one of the little pleasures I found during the COVID period.
These days, when I sit on a bench, I get the company of bright blue birds "bluejay" and squirrels. In such a case, I try not to move as much as possible. Then, little friends do not run away and stay and take a break with me. On such a day I feel like I have received a very nice gift from my favorite animals. I was so busy before this COVID that I didn't have time like this treasure, so it is true that there's something you can get if you lose something.
Golden Gate Park is a very nice and peaceful park. If you have a chance to come to San Francisco after the COVID has calmed down, I highly recommend you to visit this charming and beautiful place.
#sanfrancisco #goldengatepark #smallhappiness
My Flying Dog
My tiny Bambi (my chihuahua girl) is a typical cuddly loving doggie. She loves being held and cuddled. When I meet my friends, she always wants to be held by me. She is shy with people and doggies but I want her to get used to other people, so I ask my friends to hold her. If she can't see me, Bambi is totally fine with them...but when she sees me...
WHOOSH!!! She tries to fly to me. Bambi does this no matter how far she is from me! Bambi totally thinks she can fly! She is serious and determined to fly so we got to be careful. She is really funny funny pup. But, well, I have to admit that her desparate attempts are too cute. And, it was an episode that I can't help loving my flying dog even more.
Ito Ogawa's Book
My mom had been in the hospital for about 10 months before she died. At that time, my mom was very weak and there were very limited things she could do. However, she said that she enjoyed reading Ito Ogawa's books. So my sister took lots of Ogawa Ito's books to the hospital for mom. As soon as she passed away, I asked my sister, "Who was the writer my mom liked recently?" I wanted to read them right away, but I couldn't get any books because of COVID.
I live in San Francisco, and Japanese books are very expensive to buy (about twice as expensive as in Japan), so when I want to read Japanese books, usually, I borrow them at a library near Japantown. There are many Japanese books there, so normally, there is no problem. However, due to COVID, libraries were closed and recently about 2-3 designated libraries have reopened in the city. But it is a system that receives books reserved online at the entrance called curbside pickup that cannot be brought into the library. After 3 plus months later, I was finally able to receive the first book "Shokudo Katatsumuri".
Immediately after I got the book, I was too sad to read...the book reminded me of my mom so much. I couldn't read it for a while, but I finally read it the day before last. When I started reading, I read it all at once. It was a very good book. I knew I would like this book because my mom liked them. We always had similar taste in books after all.
While reading the book, I thought about my mom a lot. Because my mom had tracheotomy which is a hole in her throat towards the end, she could not eat anything for the last three months or so. She said, "I want to rehabilitate quickly and eat something delicious", but since that thought has not come true and has passed away. Many delicious dishes in the book must have been like a dream for her. At the end of the book, the death of Rinko's (main character) 's mother (although her personality is completely different from my mom's) and my mom's death overlapped in my thoughts. Did my mom think she was going to die?
I was able to borrow some more books by Ito Ogawa, so I'm looking forward to reading them now. I hope I can read a little more calmly for the other books. When I read them, I am gonna brew delicious tea that my mom liked.
#book #ItoOgawa #library #sanfrancisco
After my mom's death
It's been little over three months since my mom's death. In the mean time, I can hardly remember what I was doing, other than crying. That said, in the course of three months, (it's less than before but) I resumed some pet sitting and dog walking jobs, I became one year older, I cooked, I ate, I breathe, I took care of my baby Bambi, I talked to people, so maybe I look normal and possibly even more energetic than usual. But in fact, it's like my mind and body have fallen apart since my mother's death, and even if I'm doing something, my mind is like being somewhere else.
Will this strange sense of instability return to its original state someday? Or will it stay like this all the time now? Especially, soon after my mom passed away, I had regrets in my head and my heart was so painful that I couldn't help it. My mom asked me to come back to Japan. Why didn't I come back in February like I always did for last many years...? Every time I returned home, she put circle my arrival date on her calendar. She counted everyday how many day left till my arrival date. She was looking forward to see me more than anybody else. Why did I argue with her and I felt annoyed sometimes when I was with her? I know now that all of which were because I felt safe with her. I could tell her anything without fear of losing because I knew she loves me and I love her no matter what. How immature I was! I shouldn't have taken it for granted her love. I loved her so so much. Even now, I feel like if I call her, she will reply me with her smile and sweet voice. It took me almost two hours to write this short sentence because I cried too much. I am still such a mess...
#death #sorrow #mother #sanfranciscolife
My mother's death
My mother died on August 6th. The last entry date of this doodling blog was August 5th. It's unbelievable, but it's been more than four months since my mother passed away. Since then, I couldn't draw, write or anything. I felt like I was paralyzed.
I had returned to Japan every year, sometimes twice, three times to see my father and mother especially after my mother's condition became bad (I live in San Francisco). However, I couldn't go back at all this year due to COVID...then, in the middle of COVID era, my mother passed away.
After my father's sudden death two years ago, only my mother, who was sick, remained. My mother was in and out of the hospital at least for last five years or her life. She had been in the hospital since I returned home in October of last year. She was determined to go home and she told me that a few weeks before her death. She worked very hard to get well more than anyone could. I admire her strength and will. So I know I am selfish to say this...but I wanted to see my mother one more time.
#death #mother #chihuahua #lifewithdog #sanfranciscolife
Mask and Fine
It's been a while since mask (face covering) in public became mandatory . At this time, we can't enter any grocery stores or public spaces without mask or face covering in California. Fortunately, there are many masks out there and I can find them with reasonable prices at many places. It's common sense and common decency that we can all do to protect from spreading COVID-19 to each other. I am surprised that there are some people who don't wear them because they have freedom not to wear them! Maybe not so surprising given that our own president didn't believe in the importance or effectiveness of mask-wearing until recently.
However, anti-mask people will be greatly reduced soon... why? There will be a fine at many places including San Mateo county. If it passes, there will be ticketing of people who refuse to wear masks; cited 1st time $100 fine, cited 2nd time $200 fine and cited 3rd time within a year $500 fine !!! At this point, there are no fines in San Francisco.
I believe that wearing mask saves life and helps people you know or love. I do support wearing masks in public and social distancing. However, this type of law passed so quickly and not laws for the other issues that many people actually need.... Well, either way, the last thing we need at this difficult time is ... getting a huge fine. Wear a mask everyone!
日本語でもぶろぐ書いています。リンクはここ！
I need a mask, mama!
11 weeks of keto life and Egg days 🥚🥚🥚
It's been 11 weeks since I started Ketogenic lifestyle. Here is the link → for my 1st week, my 2nd week, my 3rd week, my 4th week., my 5th week, my 6th week, my 7th week , my 8th week , my 9th weekand my 10th week. I record my progress on my blog every week but there hasn't been much change. So I did something different last week (on keto).
I did 3 days of "egg days". Lots of people tried this but I didn't want to eat just boiled eggs all day long so I combined boiled eggs (as main food) plus vegetables and fruits. Since I am on keto, the only fruits I can have are berries and tomatos. The below pictures are some of my foods that I ate on "egg days". I used "pasture-raised" "organic" eggs from Costco. Since I love eggs very much, I thought it's gonna be pretty easy for me... but I got tired of boiled eggs 🥚🥚🥚 I ate 3 eggs per meal on my 1st day...but I ate 1 or 2 eggs per meal on my 3rd day. I didn't want to eat any more boiled eggs 😣😣😣
Before I started my 3 days "egg days", I did one "cheat-day". Since I started keto life, I did have some questionable seasoning on take-out food (may not be keto) before... but this was my first full "cheat-day".
It was so much fun doing "cheat-day"!!! I was planning more but I couldn't get all the foods I wanted. However, I got lots of foods I had been craving for a long time and I was happy to share them with Bambi's papa. After I did cheat day, I gained 1lb. Then, I started egg days. 1st day...lost 1.2lb, 2nd day...lost 0.6lb and 3rd day...lost 0.6lb. 3 egg days total...I lost 2.4lb. Then, I switched back to regular keto food and gained back 0.6lb. Okay, I gained 1lb (cheat day) and 0.6lb (back to reg keto). so over all I lost 0.8lb. It's less than 1lb. so I say...at the end of the week almost no changes last week 😑😑😑
These are some of my foods I ate the rest of the week. ↑ Fried chicken might not be on keto (breading and seasoning) but I allow myself this. I do not eat things like "rice" "pasta" and "potato" with them though. Just chicken or chicken with non starchy veggies. I think that it's a good compromise for take-out. I have to confess that I ate 1/2 of sesame ball and coconut mochi that my friend brought to the picnic, too 😅
This week I didn't cook any new recipe. I did get some new keto sweets and treid them. ↑ such as Lili's chocolate bars, Enlightened icecreams. They are all keto sweets so super low carb and zero sugars! Amazing!!! My favorite was two icecreams "coffee" and "chocolate peanut butter" that my friend brought to our picnic. SO yum! I want to try more and there are more and more 'keto friendly" foods out there. So exciting! Let's have a fun keto life ❣❣❣
日本語でもぶろぐ書いています。リンクはここ！
I helped with mama's eggs ... egg yolk only 🥚🥚🥚
